Horny Pick Up Lines

Hey, how about you sit on my face and let me eat my way to you heart?

Are you a cupcake? (No....why...?) Cause you probably taste really sweet!!!!

Do you like lollipops? Cause I'll take you to my candy shop.

Are you from Ireland? Cause when I look at you my penis is Dublin.

I can't make a cherry pop, but I can make a banana cream.

Ever stuck a hot dog in a donut? Do you want to?

I want to be pooh so i can stick my nose in your honey.

Can I put my magic wand in your Harry Potter.

Girl, I would love to lick your belly button......from the inside!

Do you give head to stangers? No. Well let me intruduce myself.



Your so hot that even on a cold winter night my penis would stand for you.

I'm an astronaut & my next mission is to explore uranus!

Hey baby can you please calm my monster down.

He: Do you wanna go to my stable? She: Why? He: So you can ride my pony!!

Hey, I'm from the Middle East, and i have a weapon of mass destruction in my pants.

Do you wanna be my kangaroo so we can hop all night.

Do you want to be like my speedo and hug my balls?

Do you like Backstreet Boys. Good, because my penis is larger than life.

I'll give you a nickle if you tickle my pickle....ill give you a dime if you take your time.

While behind someone at a fast food place say; you should order a number 69; ( what's 
that?) an order of fries and a coke with me on the side.

The trojans loved helen so much they jumped into a horse, i love u so much i wanna jump 
into a trojan.

guy: my mom told me to never look at pretty girls because i will turn into a statue! In fact 
i can feel myself getting hard right now!

I would be honored if I could park my beef bus in tuna town.

I'm Irish, wanna taste my lucky charms?

I wish I were a burger, so I can get between those buns.

You must be my new boss because you just gave me a raise.

I'm a french fry and you're ketchup. Can i get in you?

Just like a tootsie roll pop, I'd liked to find out how many licks it takes to get to your 
center.

You're a pile of leaves... I wanna jump right in!

If you jingle my bells I can promise you a white Christmas.

Nike took my motto: Just Do It.

For women: when he asks to get into your pants just say, No thanks I have one asshole in 
there already!

Do you like to party? Then crawl up my leg and have a ball!

I was just wondering could those lips pull a ten pound vacuum on a onion sack?

Screw me if I'm wrong, but isn't that Elvis over there?

Hi, i'm peter pants-less. wanna go to never-neverland?

You're on fire. Can I stop drop and roll with you?

I just got the shocks changed on my car. Want to try them out?

I'm a fireman, wanna see my hose?

Remember my name. you'll be screaming it later.

You are what you eat, and tonight I want to be you.

So can we hang out with my wang out or what?

Do you have a gynecologist... cause i just got my degree.

I got the F-C-K. All I need is U.

There’s a snickers in my pants….hungry why wait?

I'm learning about sex in biology...wanna experiment?

You look good in that shirt, but you would look even better with it off.

Are we In Alaska because I feel like a sexkimo!

Are you a mechanic? because you should be screwing me.

Your eyes are like wrenches ..... they make my nuts tighten.

What time do your legs open?

I'm good at math U+I=69.

Hey, want to play house. I could be the door and you could slam me all night long.

Girl your like a cream puff...hard to get into..but once you do its like a dream...silky and 
smooth.

Will you sleep with me tonight? Cuz I'm afraid of the dark.

Are you with the Cingular plan? Because you got my bar raised!

What's a slut like you doing in a high class place like this?

Girl, you're like a pickup truck. It takes more than one load to get the job done.

Hey, I've got something to show you! Stand back it takes more room! (As you reach for your 
zipper).

Guy: Are you Catsup? Girl: No, Why? Guy: Cause i'm mustard, we should get together on a 
weiner.

(He) I'm not very good at my hobby (She) What's your hobby (He) keeping it in my pants.

Do u like the taste of chicken? We'll then suck on this it tastes foul.

I taste like candy. If you don't believe me why don't you try some.

If I was a skateboard I would grind you all night.

I'm like a snow storm,i'll give you 8 to 10 inches and keep you inside for the whole 
weekend.

I'm like budweiser, always fills you up never lets you down.

I just made my bed. Ya wana help me mess it up again?"

You make me want to have an affair.

It won't be a late night.. you'll be in bed by 7 and home by 11.

Give me a dollar and I'll make you holler.

Do you know the difference between a Quarter Pounder with cheese and a blowjob? Well 
then, let me take you out to lunch.

Were you born on a farm? because you really know how to raise a cock!

Hey, do you like France? (If yes:) So do I! Let's go and French!

What are you doing tonight? Besides me?

All I want is peace and quiet, give me a piece and I'll be quiet.

You must be this tall (hold up hand as if to measure height) to ride the (your name).

You wanna go skinny dipping... in my water bed?

There's a little man in my pants and he would really like you to pet him.

Wanna play some football? We can both be skins…

Shall we shag now or shag later?

Baby, I want to strap you on like a feedbag. One leg over each ear!

You know, sex is like golf. It sucks until you finally get the ball in the hole yourself.

You're like a light switch..You turn me on.

There's a little man in my pants and he wants to meet you.

I've got a fire in my pants and you're the only one who can put it out.

I’m tired. You’re tired. Let’s sleep together!

Baby, I'm like a firefighter, I find 'em hot and leave 'em wet!

Around you I'm like a complex word, long and hard.

guy:::: How do you scare a bee??

girl:::: i don't know how?

guy::::BOOBIE!!((grab her boob)))

I do floors, doors, windows, and you.

Can I use your thighs as earmuffs??

I have a math equation for you. You + me + whipped cream = a good idea.

Labor Day Quotes

My grandfather once told me that there were two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was much less competition.

~ Indira Gandhi

Men are made stronger on realization that the helping hand they need is at the end of their own right arm.

~ Sidney J. Phillips

I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.

~ Thomas Jefferson

All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence.

~ Martin Luther King Jr.

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.

~ Confucius

The man who rolls up his shirt sleeves is rarely in danger of losing his shirt.

~ Anonymous

If a man will not work, he shall not eat.

~ 2 Thessalonians 3:10 (NIV)

A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life depend on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving.

~ Albert Einstein

Work is no disgrace; the disgrace is idleness.

~ Greek proverb

Each morning sees some task begin,
Each evening sees it close;
Something attempted, some done,
Has earned a night’s repose.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

No great achievement is possible without persistent work.

~ Bertrand Russell

There is no substitute for hard work.

~ Thomas Edison

A man is not paid for having a head and hands, but for using them.

~ Elbert Hubbard

I believe in the dignity of labor, whether with head or hand; that the world owes no man a living but that it owes every man an opportunity to make a living.

~ John D. Rockefeller

Under the spreading chestnut tree
The village smithy stands;
The smith a mighty man is he
With large and sinewy hands.
And the muscles of his brawny arms
Are strong as iron bands.
He earns whatever he can,
His brow is wet with honest sweat,
And looks the whole world in the face,
For he owes not any man.

~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.

~ Bill Cosby

Thunder is good, thunder is impressive;
but it is lightning that does the work.

~ Mark Twain

Before the reward there must be labor. You plant before you harvest. You sow in tears before you reap joy.

~ Ralph Ransom

Work hard, but not just to please your masters when they are watching. As slaves of Christ, do the will of God with all your heart. Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.

~ Ephesians 6:6-7

Graduation!

"Graduation is a time of completion, of finishing, of an ending, however, it is also a time of celebration of achievement and a beginning for the new graduate." Catherine Pulsifer "You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world. " Tom Brokaw  "There is a good reason they call these ceremonies 'commencement exercises'. Graduation is not the end; it's the beginning."Orrin Hatch  "I will reach for the stars no matter how hard it seems, and fly like a bird with the knowledge this journey brings." Semetra C. Vanison  "Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine."Anthony J. D'Angelo "Goals are the fuel in the furnace of achievement." B. Tracy, find more quotes to live by to share with the new graduate "Graduation is only a concept. In real life every day you graduate. Graduation is a process that goes on until the last day of your life. If you can grasp that, you'll make a difference." Arie Pencovici "At commencement you wear your square-shaped mortarboards.My hope is that from time to time you will let your minds be bold, and wear sombreros." Paul Freund  "Your senior graduation is a milestone in your life! Congratulations!" Catherine Pulsifer "The fireworks begin today. Each diploma is a lighted match, each one of you is a fuse." Ed Koch "The first of many graduations of life. From elementary school to senior school, each one holds successes for you to enjoy." C Pulsifer "Don't ever rob a bank. Enjoy life. Have fun. Choose to be happy now; don't wait until you're 'successful,' because honestly, I was as happy when we were unemployed and scrounging around for a buck." Peter Farrelly "You're young and you're bulletproof and invincible. But never underestimate the power of other people's love and prayer." Tony Snow  "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seuss "It's not your blue blood, your pedigree or your college degree. It's what you do with your life that counts." Millard Fuller "The future lies before you Like a field of driven snow, be careful how you tread it, for every step will show." Author Unknown "A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that "individuality" is the key to success. Robert Orben "I have learned this at least by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dream, and endeavors to live the life which he had imagines, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours." Henry David Thoreau "Commencement speeches were invented largely in the belief that outgoing college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated." Garry Trudeau "To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, To find the best in others, To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded." Words of wisdom for the new graduate from Ralph Waldo Emerson  "Graduation day is tough for adults. They go to the ceremony as parents. They come home as contemporaries. After twenty-two years of child-raising, they are unemployed." Erma Bombeck "As you go through your week, month, and even New Year, recognize the people who have packed your parachute and enabled you to get where you are today!" Author Unknown "Find opportunities in change,especially in today's world where change is moving at a fast pace, don't let change overwhelm you, let change help you find opportunities you may have never seen!" Catherine Pulsifer "Today is the day I will change my mind, and leave all the negative things behind." Semetra C. Vanison, wisdom from Today Is The Day  "Great minds have purposes, others have wishes." Washington Irving "The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet."Aristotle "Think big thoughts but relish small pleasures." H. Jackson Brown, Jr "Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else." Judy Garland "Life is my college. May I graduate well, and earn some honors!" Louisa May Alcott "The man who graduates today and stops learning tomorrow is uneducated the day after." Newton D. Baker "An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest. Benjamin Franklin "The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit." Nelson Henderson  Wisdom for the new graduate from Albert Einstein "Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant." Robert Louis Stevenson "Wise are those who learn that the bottom line doesn't always have to be their top priority." William Arthur Ward "Look at education as a continuous life long journey." Catherine Pulsifer  "As a lot of us have found out, graduation only means that you are ready to keep learning, to keep your skills advanced and growing because you never know when you will find yourself out on the street." Byron Pulsifer, The Finish "Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire."Arnold H. Glasow "The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows." Sydney Harris  "The best helping hand that you will ever receive is the one at the end of your own arm."Fred Dehner "Wherever you go, go with all your heart."Confucius "Education is our passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to the people who prepare for it today." Malcolm X  "The trouble with learning from experience is that you never graduate." Doug Larson "Do or do not. There is no try."Yoda  "It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves." Edmund Hillary "The best helping hand that you will ever receive is the one at the end of your own arm."Fred Dehner

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

I got This From My Friends and its a corny lines to help you to make a smile to your love ones

” Are you a parking ticket? ’cause you got fine-fine-fine written all over ya.”

” Girl, you must be tired ’cause you’ve been running through my mind all day!”

” So what was it like, falling from heaven?”

” Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.”

” Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?”

” Do you have 35 cents? My mom said to call her when I found a wife”

” Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.”

” You’re so beautiful; your birthday should be a national holiday.”

” Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?”

” Do you know karate? Cause your body’s kickin’!”

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.

There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.

Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!

Hey baby, you've got something on your butt: my eyes.

Hi, I make more money than you can spend.

I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

I must be in heaven because I'm standing next to you!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

You must be from out of space cause I can see the stars in your eyes.

If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart.

Baby did you fart, 'cause you blow me away!

Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say...

"I'm not really this tall....I'm sitting on my wallet."

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

When I saw you from across the room, I passed out cold and hit my head on

the floor...so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.

You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.

Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!

Is there an airport nearby or is that my heart taking off?

Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

My love for you is like a concave up function because it is always increasing.

How can I know so many hundreds of digits of pi and not the 7 digits of your phone number?

I wish I was your second derivative so I could investigate your concavities.

You and I would add up better than a Riemann sum.

Hey baby, what's your sine?

I need a little help with my Calculus, can you integrate my natural log?

By looking at you I can tell you're 36-25-36, which by the way are all perfect squares.

You fascinate me more than the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus.

Since distance equals velocity times time, let's let velocity and time approach infinity, because I want to go all the way with you.

I am equivalent to the Empty Set when you are not with me.

I don’t like my current girlfriend. Mind if I do a you-substitution?

I can figure out the square root of any number in less than 10 seconds. What? You don’t believe me? Well, then, let’s try it with your phone number.

Hey, baby want to Squeeze my Theorem while I poly your nomial?

Hey...nice asymptote.

i'm not being obtuse, but you're acute girl.

I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you back to my domain.

I'll take you to your limit if you show me your end behavior.

Can i explore your mean value?

Being without you is like being a metric space in which exists a cauchy sequence that does not converge

My love for you is a monotonically increasing unbounded function

You are the solution to my homogeneous system of linear equations.

i'll take you to the limit as x approaches infinity.

Your name is Leslie? Look, I can spell your name on my calculator!

Let's take each other to the limit to see if we converge

Let me integrate our curves so that i can increase our volume

If i were a function you would be my asymptote - i always tend towards you.

Your beauty cannot be spanned by a finite basis of vectors.

I wish i was your problem set, because then i'd be really hard, and you'd be doing me on the desk.

My love is like an exponential curve. it's unbounded

My love for you is like a fractal - it goes on forever.

My love for you is like the derivative of a concave up function because it is always increasing. we're going to assume this concave up function resembles x^2 so that slopes is actually increasing.

I hope you know set theory because i want to intersect and union you

You've got more curves than a triple integral.

Honey, you're sweeter than pi.

If you were sin x and I was cos x, then together we'd make one.

My friends told me that I should ask you out because you can't differentiate. Do you need math help?

Wanna expand my polynomial?

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

Hello, I'm doing a survey of what people think are the cheesiest pickup lines. So, do you pick 'Do you come here often?', 'What's your sign?', or 'Hello, I'm doing a survey of what people think are the cheesiest pickup lines.'?

(hold out hand) Would you hold this for me while I go for a walk?

This time next year let’s be laughing together.

Didn't I see you on the cover of Vogue?

Excuse me, I don't want you to think I'm ridiculous or anything, but you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to tell you.

Have you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it?

Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on!

Hey, don't I know you? Yeah, you're the girl with the beautiful smile.

Was your father a mechanic? Then how did you get such a finely tuned body?

I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?

I hope you know CPR, cuz you take my breath away!

I just had to come talk with you. Sweetness is my weakness.

I think I can die happy now, cause I've just seen a piece of heaven.

Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?

I sneezed because God blessed me with you.

Is it hot in here or is it just you?

Nice to meet you, I'm (your name) and you are...gorgeous!

So, what do you do for a living besides always making all the men excited and warm all over?

Was your dad king for a day? He must have been to make a princess like you.

Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good.

Were your parents Greek Gods, 'cause it takes two gods to make a goddess.

What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?

What's that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty. Here, let me get it off. Hey, it's not coming off!

Wow! Are those real?

Ya know, you look really hot! You must be real reason for global warming.

You are the reason men fall in love.

You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!

You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once!

You know, you might be asked to leave soon. You're making the other women look really bad.

You look like my third wife. [how many time have you been married?] Twice.

You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.

You should be someone's wife.

Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot.

Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?

I want to be your tear drop, so I could be born in your eyes, live on your cheeks, and die on your lips.

Babe! you look so fine I could drink your bath water!

You're so hot you would make the devil sweat.

If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever.

Excuse me.....Hi, i'm writing a term paper on the finer things in life, and i was wondering if i could interview you...

If god made any thing better than you he keep it for him self.

Girl, if I were a fly, I'd be all over you, because you're the shit!

There must be a lightswitch on my forehead because everytime I see you, you turn me on!

Hey, how did you do that? (What?) Look so good?

Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

If you stood in front of a mirror and help up 11 roses, you would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.

If God made anything more pretty, I'm sure he'd keep it for himself.

You are so beautiful that I would marry your brother just to get into your family.

You look like a cool glass of refreshing water, and I am the thirstiest man in the world.

Are you a tamale? 'Cause you're hot.

You are so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine.

Do you want to see a picture of a beautiful person? (hold up a mirror)

Do you bleach your teeth? 'Cause your smile lights up the entire room like a candle in the dark. Let's go prove it.

Your ass is so nice that it is a shame that you have to sit on it.

Someone should call the police, because you just stole my heart!

Stop, drop, and roll, baby. You are on fire.

Baby, you're so hot, you make the equator look like the north pole.

Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.

If it weren't for that DAMNED sun, you'd be the hottest thing ever created.

How is your fever? [What fever?] Oh... you just look hot to me.

I just got dumped, and I think that you could make me feel better.

(Walk up to someone and bite them anywhere) Sorry, taking a bite out of crime. [WHAT?] Well it has to be illegal to look that good!

You are a 9 - you'd be a perfect 10 if you were with me.

Excuse me, I'd like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your parents created such a beautiful creature.

You're so hot, I bet you could light a candle at 10 paces.

My buddies over there said that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the bar. Wanna buy some drinks with some of their money?

I can't believe I've been hear the entire evening with all these beautiful people and the moment I find 'The One', all I have time to say is "good bye".

Hey baby, you've got somthing on your butt: my eyes.

This isn't a beer belly, It'a a fuel tank for a love machine.

I don't know you, but I think I love you already.

You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill.

Here's the key to my house, my car... and my heart.

if we shared a garden, I'd put my tulips and your tulips together. (tulips = two lips)

Is your name Summer? 'Cause you are as hot as hell.

If I had to choose between one night with you or winning the lottery...I would chose winning the lottery...but it would be close...real close...

Do you have any sunscreen? 'Cause you are burning me up!

See these keys? I wish I had the one to your heart.

Stare at girl . ("What're you staring at?") You, Before I Wake Up From this Dream.

You're hotter than donut grease.

Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.

If you could put a price tag on beauty you'd be worth more than Fort Knox.

I must be dancing with the devil, because you're hot as hell.

I never need to see the sun again because your eyes light up my world.

If you were a steak you would be well done.

It's dark in here. Wait! It's because all of the light is shining on you.

Is your name Katrina? [No, why?] 'Cuz baby, you rock me like a hurricane!

Can you pull this heart-shaped arrow out of my butt? A damn little kid with wings shot me.

On The Phone She/He says: "Hold on" You Say: "Sorry, I can't hold on... I've already fallen for you."

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

Robert BurtonNo cord or cable can so forcibly draw, or hold so fast, as love can do with a twined thread.

Alexandra PenneyThe ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands.

Mignon McLaughlinNo one can understand love who has not experienced infatuation. And no one can understand infatuation, no matter how many times he has experienced it.

AnonymousA kiss is something you cannot give without taking and cannot take without giving.

Theodor ReikThe lover is a monotheist who knows that other people worship different gods but cannot himself imagine that there could be other gods.

Henny YoungmanA kiss is the shortest distance between two.

Mae WestI have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them.

Marguerite de ValoisIt is the same in love as in war; a fortress that parleys is half taken.

Todd RuthmanIt is the things in common that make relationships enjoyable, but it is the little differences that make them interesting.

William ShakespeareLove looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.

AerosmithFalling in love is so hard on the knees.

AnonymousTrue love is when you put someone on a pedestal, and they fall - but you are there to catch them.

Mignon McLaughlinIn the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.

Jacques Benigne BossuelThe heart has reasons that reason does not understand.

Philip RobinsonAnd when the future hinges on the next words that are said, don't let logic interfere, believe your heart instead.

Luciano de CrescenzoWe are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another.

Julins GordonLove is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.

AristotleLove is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

You must be a prizefighter. One look at you, and I’m knocked out.

With my luck, you’re probably here with someone.

Here I am! What were your other two wishes?

I really like your tan lines!

I lost my phone number. Could I borrow yours?

Hi! Are you here to meet a nice man (or woman)? Or will I do?

Your shoe is untied. Can I tie it for you?

Have you ever had a guy follow you across the quad (or into a coffeehouse, onto the Metro) because he liked your smile?

Say…didn’t we go to different schools at the same time?

Do you have a quarter? I want to call your parents and thank them.

My name is Elmo. You can tickle me anytime.

You’re someone I could really blog about!

Were we lovers in a past life?

Um! You got sweet lips, hips, and fingertips.

Do you mind if I stare at you up close instead of from across the room?

Just because computers are incompatible doesn’t mean we are.

I memorized every number in the phone book, but managed to lose yours. I'm gonna need to get that.

Baby, you're sexier than socks on a rooster.

Would it freak you out if I said that I've already told my mother about you? (No, why?) Well, I already called her and asked her how to approach you.

Hey, if I kiss you, will I get slapped?

A man on a date wonders if he'll get lucky. I guess you already know.

I guess I just wasn’t called to celibacy.

Excuse me, miss, are you here alone, or is the huge guy coming this way your brother?

Are you the girl from my future?

Coast Guard regulations, Miss - I have to inspect you for sand mites. (on the beach)

Would you like to get Chinese food (or Mexican or Italian or sushi) with me?

Oh, I’m having that dream again!

Did you drop this? (Hold out a dollar or a pen.)

Have you planned our wedding yet?

Do you like to cuddle?

Do you know how to use a whip?

Donna Summer wrote a song about you – “Hot Stuff.”

Were you in the high school band?

Were you ever a cheerleader?

Do you like music? (Yes) Good, I've got a great stereo system at home!

Are you the man (woman) of my dreams?

O.K. you can kiss me later, but don’t tell anybody.

(for Catholic high-school kids) You look fab in that plaid jumper!

(for Catholics and Episcopalians in church) Confess here often?

I just won the lottery! (Reply) No, I just met you!

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

“Limits exist only in the mind.”

Beautiful tomorrow never comes.
When it comes, it is already TODAY ....!
In the hunt of beautiful tomorrow
Don't waste your wonderful today...!

“Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.”

“I guess you lose some and win some, long as the outcome is income. You know I want it all and then some.”

 

"I’m in the world where things are taken, never given. How long they choose to love you will never be your decision.”

 

“Trying to convince myself I’ve found one. Making the mistake I never learned from.”

 

 “She’s crying now but she’ll laugh again.” 

 

“Dear haters, I couldn’t help but notice that ‘awesoM’” ends with ‘me’ and ‘Ugly’ starts with ‘u’.”

“Relationships are sometimes friends forever.” 

 

“Jealousy is nothing more than a fear of abandonment.”

 

“When love hurts you, dare to love again.”

Corny Lines, Qoutes, Jokes

"Between 1987 and 2012 the destructive impact of humanity peaks out so it can resurrect. The world's getting worse in order to get better."

One night William told us, "True astrology, contrary to the pop version, is the art of identifying a person's uniqueness. That everyone is unique is a truism so commonplace as to be cliche. But authentic star work pinpoints the precise ways each of us is a distinct one-of-a-kind being."

"The Atlanteans knew the great secret that Earth, like the human body, is a fluid medium, awash in tides of electromagnetic force, composed of invisible meridians, energy frequencies that weave together matter and can be manipulated for various purposes. Everything here is energy."

"The future hinges upon the main soul drama of our species: will humankind awaken in time to claim its bright inheritance, or repeat the mistakes of the past and vanish in the muck?"

"The riddle of our time is figuring out how to keep ourselves busy while the old drama of corrupt power plays its final scene. Underneath business as usual, though, the world's becoming pliant and volatile, claylike, raw, newborn, filled with danger and possibility."

"When Earth dies, a part of us dies with her. I can't overstate the intensity of this. All over the world, underneath business as usual, the human soul is writhing -- and needs to -- and we have to stop repressing this fact and just get on with it so we can shed the skin of the past. But snakes are blind when they shed, so a great darkness is rising to consume the world."

"Humanity's going to get very confused in the coming years and will need help as the new clashes with the old. Priestesses and yogis and shamans must rise from the ranks of secretaries and salesmen. Mundane life must split open its sacred core. We can no longer pretend to be normal. We're entering crisis, and everybody's recruited to dig for something deeper."

"If prophecies of kali yuga are correct and the long hell of humanity is finally ending, then we have to face the fact that the old is also rising to assert itself one last time before giving up the ghost. That's what life forms do when faced with immanent destruction."

"This will mess with your head because retrogressive forces all over the planet, sensing their demise, will act out more than ever. We cannot allow ourselves to be distracted by this. You can't bite the poisoned apple one more time."

"Inspiration and enthusiasm open the channels," answered William. "Creative imagination is key. You've got to bust through numbness and isolation and fire up the soul. We have a lot of help for this, because the creative force locked in human beings is sick to death of being marginalized while machinelike drones take over the world."

"The current Cosmic Weather Report," said the mage, "is that we've entered dangerous squalls of long-term high-pressure crisis that can be creatively understood as a major planetary death and rebirth. In your own way, whoever you are, wherever you live, the coming world pressure is asking you to mid-wife this process."

"We have to awaken ourselves to awaken our world. We have to grasp the fact that life is so much more than we've been told. Even in a time of great deceit, deep force lies buries in the soul of the species, aching to come out."

"You get the world to change by changing yourself, and holding that position until underground force building in collective consciousness gains critical mass to catalyze world change."

"Crisis has the power to break the mass trance and ope you to something resurrective being seeded in the midst of loss and despair. Crisis undrugs the drugged state that passes for normalcy. It cracks you into a raw enough state to pry loose and repattern."

"Even great evil serves to illustrate good, by pushing the pendulum so far in the opposite direction that it has to swing back."

"Underground momentum for this has been building for centuries. The world is changing. Time is shifting. Karma is quickening. The veil between worlds is thinning. The dead are coming closer to the living. Spirit forces are flocking to our planet."